6/28/2012 11:09:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Teacher : make a sentence in which 1 word repeated 4 times
Student : lara dutta marries brian lara and she becomes lara lara :P


Teacher: is line ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gya.
Student: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan....


Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Student: The future tense is "u will go to jail".


Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?

6/25/2012 02:31:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Teacher asks children, what do you wish to do in future?
Classroom
Ram : I want to be a pilot.
Vinod : I want to be a doctor.
Deepa : I want to be a good mother.
Ravi : I want to help Deepa.

6/25/2012 02:29:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

Daughter told to her mother, “Right now I have seen a healthy white big cat went out from our kitchen”
white-cat.jpg
Mother told, ” It is good sign and fortune to see a white

6/25/2012 02:27:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

Banta Singh : “Yaar Santa, last year the name plate outside your house read Santa Singh, B.A. This year it reads Santa Singh, M.A.When did you finish your Masters Degree?”
house
Santa Singh : You don’t understand. Last year my wife died, I put B.A. to indicate “Bachelor Again”. Then I took a second wife, So M.A. is “Married Again”.

6/25/2012 02:26:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

Teacher: Yeh kitab kiski hai?
Student: Sir, kagaj ki.
classroom.jpg
Teacher: Yeh toh mujhe bhi pataa hai.
Student: Sir, phir puchh kyon rahe hai.

6/24/2012 07:36:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Ravan : Devi bhiksha de.
Lady : Yeh lo swami.
Ravan : Rekha paar kar ke yahaan aake de do.
bagger
So she crosses the line…
Ravan : HaHaHa.. main Bhikshuk nahi… Ravan hoon !!!
Lady : Main bhi Seeta nahi, kamavali bai hoon !!!

6/24/2012 07:33:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
संता - तेरे कुत्ते ने मेरी किताब फाड़ दी !

बंता - मैं उसे अभी सजा देता हूँ.

संता - मैंने सजा दे दी.

बंता – कैसे ?

संता – मैं उसकी कटोरी का दूध पी गया … !!!

6/24/2012 07:24:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Teacher: Which is your native place?

Rahul: Maharashtra m'aam.

Teacher: Can you spell it?

Rahul: Actually my native place is goa.

6/24/2012 08:47:00 AM Edit This 0 Comments »
A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, “and why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”
churchind.jpg

Little Johnny replied, “Because we must not disturb people while sleeping.”

6/23/2012 04:52:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
A young pet monkey had an accident and needed a brain transplant. The veterinarian told the monkey's human family, "Brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the cost yourselves."
"Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the family.
"For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000," replied the vet.
All the men in the family nodded because they thought they understood. But the mother was unsatisfied and asked, "Why the difference in price between male and female brains?"
"Standard pricing practice," said the vet. "The female brains have to be marked down because they’ve actually been used!".

6/20/2012 02:10:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

6/20/2012 02:07:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

Jenny : Robin, do you know who is a Superman ?
Robin : “Yes, I know.”
clipboard01.jpg
Jenny : “Who?”
Robin : “The one who wears his red underwear over his pants.”

6/20/2012 02:05:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

Bush: Tujhe swimming aati hai?
Laaloo: No!
Bush:Tere se kutta acha hai jo swim kar leta hai.
Laaloo: Tujhe aati hai?
21564813thm.jpg
Bush:Haan!
Laaloo: Fir tere mein aur kutte mein kya farak hai…

6/20/2012 02:03:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Boss: Where were you born ?

Sardarji: Oye Punjab.
sardargif.jpg
Boss: Which part?
Sardarji: Oye, Kya which part? Whole body born in Punjab.

6/20/2012 01:56:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

6/19/2012 08:43:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Silly Student
Teacher: Tell me a way to prevent a disease which is caused by biting insects.
Student: Don’t get bitten by them.
Ridiculous Joke
Teacher: Suppose, you have a box which contains a 10 foot snake...
Student: But Sir, snakes don’t have feet.

6/19/2012 08:39:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
नया-नवेला जोड़ा हनीमून पर गया.

दूल्हे ने बड़े ही रोमांटिक अंदाज़ में दुल्हन से कहा – "May I kiss you… Darling ?"

दुल्हन शर्माते हुए बोली – "हमने तो कभी गैरों को भी मना नहीं किया… आप तो फिर भी अपने हो जी !!!

6/19/2012 08:37:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
संता - तेरे कुत्ते ने मेरी किताब फाड़ दी !

बंता - मैं उसे अभी सजा देता हूँ.

संता - मैंने सजा दे दी.

बंता – कैसे ?

संता – मैं उसकी कटोरी का दूध पी गया …

6/18/2012 10:45:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »


Itne Kum Marks!!
Bhola: Itne kum marks? Do thappad marne chahiye.
3243966thm.gif
Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine oos master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha hai.

Brain ka operation
Doctor ek patient ke pichhe bhag raha tha… Ek aadmi ne puchha kya hua?
doctorsd.jpg
Doctor : Are yaar char bar aisa hua hai sala brain ka operation karwana aata hai aur baal katwake chala jata hai.

6/18/2012 10:41:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »


Sardarni Painting the walls
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket.
Wall painter
Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.
She showed him the instructions on the tin and said, “For best results put on two coats.”

6/08/2012 02:21:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

6/08/2012 02:19:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »

Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said ‘Switched Off’!
sant-aphone.jpg
Banta : Nahi Pape, it’s my HELLO TUNE!

6/08/2012 02:12:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Teacher: U idiots! At your age Einstein ranked first in class.
What about you?
teacher.jpg
Student: Sir at your age Hitler committed suicide..!
What about you?

6/02/2012 01:36:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.

One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"

Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."

His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother."

A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"

With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."

The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"

Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."
An elementary school teacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school.
"If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I will promise not to believe everything your child says happens at home.

6/02/2012 01:32:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
One lady is telling to a girl, “Do you know what is the secret of being young?
The girl told, “May be take care of skin.“
youngage.jpg
The lady told, “No, the secret of being young is sleep the right numbers of hours, go with the right crowed, eat right food and tell the WRONG AGE.

6/02/2012 01:28:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
One night, a drunk comes stumbling into a bar and says to the bartender: “Drinks for all on me including you, bartender.” So the bartender follows the mans orders and says: “That will be $36.50 please.” The drunk says he has no money so the bartender slaps him around and throws him out.
bartender.jpg
The next night the same drunk comes in again and orders a drink for everyone in the bar including the bartender. Again the bartender follows instructions and again the drunk says he has no money. So the bartender slaps him around and throws him out.
On the third night he comes in, the drunk orders drinks for all except the bartender. “What, no drink for me?” replies the bartender. “Oh, no. You get violent when you drink.”
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