9/29/2013 12:38:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
The three bears had been having some trouble recently and had ended up in family court. Mama and Papa bear were splitting up, and baby bear had to decide who he was going to live with. So, the judge wanted to talk to baby bear to see what he thought about living with either of his parents. When he asked baby bear about living with his father, baby bear said "No, I can't live with Papa bear, he beats me terribly." "OK," said the judge, "then you want to live with your mother, right?" "No way!" replied baby bear, "She beats me worse than Papa bear does." The judge was a bit confused by this, and didn't quite know what to do. "Well, you have to live with someone, so is there any relatives you would like to stay with?" asked the judge. "Yes," answered baby bear, "my aunt Bertha bear who lives in Chicago." "You're sure she will treat you well and won't beat you?" asked the judge. "Oh definitely," said baby bear, "the Chicago Bears don't beat anybody."


9/28/2013 04:23:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »


Leave the Habit of Complaning
complain department
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Laptop Birdhouse
laptop-birdhouse2.jpg
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Santa hanged to death by banta



Santa and banta singh were both in a mental hospital. Once they were walking past a swimming pool, santa suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sunk to the bottom and stayed there.
Banta promptly jumped in to save him. He swam to the bottom and pulled santa out.
 hung.jpg
When the medical director became aware of banta’s heroic act, he immediately ordered him to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered him to be mentally stable.
When he went to tell banta the news he said, “Banta, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re being discharged because since you were able to jump in and
Save the life of another patient, I think you’ve regained your senses. The bad news is santa, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he’s dead.”
Then banta replied, “He didn’t hang himself. I put him there to dry.”

9/28/2013 07:48:00 AM Edit This 0 Comments »
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.
“What are you doing?” She asked.
“Hunting Flies” He responded.
fly
Oh!, Killed any?” She asked.
“Yep, 3 males, 2 Females”, he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. “How can you tell?”
He responded, “3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone”.

9/26/2013 09:44:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Banta mujra dekhne gaya, Sari raat mujra dekhta raha
Bai: Saheb humne aap ko khush kiya, Ab aap hamein khush karo.
bantadance.jpg
Toh banta utha aur khud nachne laga

9/24/2013 10:14:00 AM Edit This 0 Comments »
A Priest dies & is waiting in line at heavens gate.

Ahead of him is a guy, fashionably dressed, invdark sun glasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket & jeans.

God to the guy : Who r u ?
Guy : I am a rickshaw driver from Pune.
God : Take this gold robe & enter kingdom of heaven.

God to the Priest : Who r u ?
Priest : I am a priest & spent 40yrs preaching good to people.
God : Take this cotton robe and enter heaven.
Priest : God, how come that foul mouthed, rash driver gets a gold & I spent all my life preaching good get cotton.

God : Results, my son, results.
While you preached, people slept, when he drove, people really prayed...

“Its Performance, not Position that Counts !!”

9/16/2013 11:41:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his Customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.”
The barber puts a dollar in one hand and two quarters in the other,
then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?”
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
barber.jpg
“What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!”
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar?”
The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game’s over!”

9/12/2013 04:33:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Post Master in a post office told to a woman,”You have to put another stamp on this letter as it is too heavy.
postofficemail.jpg
The woman replied, “How would an extra stamp make it lighter.”

9/05/2013 09:45:00 AM Edit This 0 Comments »


What if the IT industry start making films ?



Computer programmar
Some future film titles will be like :-
1) Meri disk tumhare paas hai—Humara dil apke paas hai
2) Aao chat kare—Aao Pyar Kare
3) Programmer no.1—Coolie no.1
4) Mera naam developer—Mera naam joker
5) Java wale job le jayenge—Dilwale dulhaniya le jayenge

9/03/2013 02:55:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »


MERA UTARNE KA STYLE HAI.



Sardarji : Motor bike se bade jor se aatein hai aur niche gir jate hai.
Public sab aakar uper uthake puchne lagte hai, “sardar ji kaise ho?“ Sardar : Arre arre chodo bhai aap logon ki dimag kharab ho gaya hai kya.
bike
YE MERA UTARNE KA STYLE HAI…
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